It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
