Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
