What a fucking waste of an outfit
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
