its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
operation have a gay friend backfired
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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