Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
You pole danced in your parka.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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