Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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