I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
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