New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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