I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
this boner is exhausting
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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