just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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