and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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