I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize