what day is it and did you see me today?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
