I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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