I'm pants shitting drunk right now
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
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