Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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