shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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