I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
