He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
