scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Your shirt... Was in my pants
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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