New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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