walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Randomize