I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
