I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
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