Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Randomize
