That's intense
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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