And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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