she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
