id be glad to
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
