Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
They took my balls.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
