Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
