Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize