he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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