My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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