I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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