Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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