her vagine was all disorganized.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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