ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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