is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
