this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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