Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I'm both gender and math confused
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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