Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Randomize
