yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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