wanna go halves on a baby?
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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