So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
