Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?