I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!