I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
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he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
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Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
did i just pee glitter