i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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