I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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