Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
All I want is dick and wine.