Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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